Gice I do not want to feel the evil power. I want to see visions. But soon I have to take my medicine but honestly I could take it at 6 and be ok.

Gice there is such variety of craziness these days. I might need to write a poem similar to we didn’t start the fire.

Maybe think of some stuff for my comedy routine.

Gice I didn’t do that good at the discussion but I am okay with what I said. I think it was on topic and most of all I think that these people are not Christian nationalists.

So anyway I will try to think of who might like this organization. I kind of think Audrey Breen might be a possible. But I don’t know. She might already have her people but I mean why not do a zoom reshuffle.

Gice don’t you think it is amazing that God provided zoom meetings and how much it benefited me personally as someone who was tormented in person?

I mean that is kind of crazy.

Anyway too bad my appearance isn’t good on my phone.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 3:20 am. Soon I will take my medicine. Tonight I read an article that I think was Christian nationalism. It is my first encounter with it. Isn’t that weird? It was horrible and I felt the cult feeling from it. I have only felt that feeling three or four times in my life. I am thankful God spared me that particular spiritual abuse. Now I am feeling a little bit of the evil power when I think of it. so far it is going away ok and I could read old hospital notes if it persists.

I think it is not cool for the northerners to accuse all conservatives of Christian nationalism. A lot of people are voting their conscience and just wrong about some things. That is not the same as a cult. I think also there are people who conflate religion and politics but aren’t a cult either. 

I just wrote something kind of nationalist and felt the evil power. How horrible and scary. What I was going to say I do actually believe which is that I don’t know that God hasn’t led the church to work through government against threats in the world right now. Like to take control and be militarist in some ways, like I don’t know that God didn’t lead half the people to choose that.

But anyway I think one main priority is helping young people find their way and be social in positive ways. People need friends and some parents are really suffering as teens start mobbing places. But anyway, crazy times. I mean honestly I feel that we knew several years ago that “this is it,” like we knew we had to get through those years, keep insurance, etc. I mean am I wrong? But I think possibly the roll out of social media was an important thing during our time, and it is reaching a lot of other countries and stuff is available to them. Some bad stuff but some good stuff. And certain important things happened and now it is different scenarios. I mean am I right?

I mean maybe some parents organized for their teens to go be violent. I do not really know.

Gice I hope I don’t keep feeling the evil power. We should pray for people to be delivered from those cults.

Also here is a question about reincarnation and purgatory and other worlds. We know there are angel armies and spiritual battles. Well do angels get “killed” in battle and if so where do they go? Just wondering, I mean what does born again literally mean. Well have a good day everyone.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 1:12 pm on Thursday, march 19. I am safely in Greenville and comfortable in my mom’s house. The construction looks good and honestly it feels normal. I feel like it is my fault that the bathroom plumbing flooded after last time but it is fixed now.

I don’t know if I will go get barbecue from Lowe’s grocery store today. I might wait until tomorrow.

It was a good train trip. Gilbert seems mad at me but I am just glad I got here safely. He did a power play with the payment but I think it was to let me know my mom was watching from the living room. That is fine and I think she is like me on that and I have to say that these travel arrangements are not a game and I agree with her vigilance.

. I wish I had a laptop here but I am not messing up my other computer.

My mouse video hit one million views. That was really fast and I appreciate it. I guess that is my new hobby. I mean it has been fun and a blessing. I think I should not obsess about the American problems when I have a good outlet in India.

I don’t know who I will try to meet up with on my trip. Maybe Amanda, Vance, Sherrie, Mickie, Jenn, and some other pals from last time. What about Katherine. And Cynthia and who else, lots of people. Kimberly and the poetry people. I mean it was a happy life here and I am thankful.

Gice I think the social work license stuff is ok. I hope they got all my proofs etc.

Gice I might do some memes for my art page at some point. Like if I am at Panera.

Well everyone, have a good day.

 Hello everyone, 

This is Refried. It is 12:44 on Thursday, march 19. Tomorrow there is a presentation on catatonia. In about five hours I will probably be in Greenville. 

This has been a good train ride. I feel ok, I am glad I don’t have any problems from sitting down too long, and my heartburn is pretty much gone, my anxiety is normal, so far I am not in agony like when I can’t stand it. That hasn’t happened on every recent trip so maybe this time will be okay too. I hope the seat stays empty after train buddy leaves. Because you know what I got a bad person once and it was awful. I think if that happens I will ask the worker if I can move seats.

Hopefully it will be fine. It turned out that I could listen to my phone some without headphones.

I visited my low iron numbers. It seems ok and I will take the new medicine soon.

They marked me down for schizophrenia. What do you Gice think about that. I just feel like people can’t logically ignore the textbook manic episodes.

Ok so I guess people are wondering about seizures. I haven’t really had any seizure symptoms lately. That is a good thing too.

Well everyone, I wish I had more gold coins on my royal match game but it is okay.

Does anyone have any thoughts 

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. I am on the train. It is 11:42. I have heartburn but took two tums. Usually I need mylanta and tums but the mylanta I have is old however I think I could swallow another swallow if I need to.

Right now I am plotting to give more books to people and it is too bad I did not bring any for train buddies but you know what frankly people can buy the books online if they want some books. I mean after four years then I would think some people could just scrape up five dollars and choose a book they find interesting.

But anyway I appreciate the care for this trip and people helping it not be torturesome. I forgot to bring anxiety medicine but think I am ok on that.

I feel like I can still take train trips and probably once I get home it will be like normal.

I don’t think I am being two faced so far on the conservatives. I mean have you Gice read blob mentality. I think A C would like that book but I don’t see a mailing address.

My heartburn got a little better. It is mostly okay just kind of comes back sometimes like when I have a symptom and it seems to align with thoughts but really it is the stress reaction.

But anyway was MC mad at me. I think she was communicating that people were going to get in trouble for the various cases of ptsd that I mentioned.

But I don’t know. I mean maybe it was because I said combat and captivity but I know I am on to something and I think she deserves to know about it.

I mean that there could be a whole fight ptsd and flight ptsd. I mean that is good stuff. 

Anyway I think I will tune into that other YouTube now.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 1:10 am on Wednesday, March 18. I need to pack a bag now. It will take ten minutes, I can do it. I should go to sleep at 2 am. 

Gice these cupcakes went well with the chick fil a. Last time I got the baked by Melissa cupcakes I was too hungry and ate all of them too fast and then they were gone. This time went much better.

Gice I feel like this was the peak of my career. I hope people enjoyed it. The jokes, the videos, the social work license. 

I feel that people care about my trip and want me to be okay and I am very thankful for that. Probably it will be fine. I made my choice with the luxury option and I feel ok.

I need to pack another joke book which I think will be for that Delaware person. I don’t think I am going to send other books for other staff people but maybe eventually.

I am going to work on being more positive now. I think people intervened about the main stuff and I should try to be a team player and good sport.

I just need to pack the bag. 

I mean I could go to sleep at 3 and be okay.

So pack the bag at 2. Sleep at 3. 

Get up at 8.

I mean is the issue leave the books here and don’t go to the post office tomorrow morning. Because I would have to carry the bag too.

Maybe that is it.

but the bag needs to be light.

I am not taking as much this time.

But I need to go to the post office because of that package that is there. 

So I am thinking light bag, go to post office, mail two books.

Does anyone have any thoughts.

 Gice I think I will mail Dr. Diana Diamond a joke book when I am able to.

Gice I am not a narcissist but the case is there for it, but I am not one. I am a self oriented entertainer and priestlike single person. It is not that easy and I don't appreciate people calling me selfish when the general consensus is eventually going to be that it was immoral for me not to do a mercy killing on myself.

And some people think I am full of myself but you don't know what kind of confidence you have to have to deliver on a national level for some stuff. You have to know that you have what it takes and then defend it.  So people can call me a narcsissist but I have a lot of friends and pray for people and get results from a merciful God.

And we need to pray for all the suffering people who for some reason, when it comes their time to get treatment, they land on narcissism. That can be very hurtful and it might not be their fault.

And as for underachievement.  It is other people who underachieved in their acceptance of me.