Hello everyone, this is Refried. Today is Juneteenth.  I am having a nice day. I need to take my medicine soon. I forgot about it and took a walk but that was good and I had a good lunch. I hurt my back gum a little bit from eating apple jacks too fast but it is okay.

I got some good emails today and talked to my lawyer about my book questions.  I still have some of my retainer and am going to use it for extra copyright registration.  The lawyer, named Tristan, answered like twenty questions.  I think that is amazing!! I sent him a cartoon that probably was copied from one of my jokes. Hmm I might post it here. Hmm I don't know if I should.  Wow I do not know. I might let it be for now.

So anyway I am doing okay and just need to keep walking and use my time in a productive way.  I sent a query today to an agent and felt good about it.  It is different than my other queries because it was for my joke book.  I really think my joke book could sell a lot. I mean I already just give it to as many people as possible.  The only limit is what I can afford.

Ok I am posting the joke and the cartoon.  My joke from three years ago, and the cartoon that could be related.  I am not going to shark anyone but I will post both things here on my blog:

I think their cartoon is funnier than my joke and yet it does seem reminiscent, doesn't it.  Well I am not going after anyone, and honestly I do hesitate to post this, except that I find it to be good material for this blog, and maybe this is when I do stick up for myself a little bit, and not really question the copying as much as I question being ignored to the point that all of my jokes are just sitting out there to be copied for three or five or ten years, meanwhile I have no income except small checks that make people hate me.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 2:30 am.  It is time to start working on inspection.  I threw away one trash bag and a pizza box a few hours ago.  Now I will make a list of what is left:  put clothes in cart, do dishes, clear and clean counter, put away remaining groceries, throw away some stuff from fridge, clear table, sweep, mop, make bed.  

That is not that much.  I will take medicine at 12:30, after inspection.  That is about when I took it today.  So I am on the right track.

I also need to clear off the chair with all the junk on it.  So that is about ten small chores.  I can do that at 11 am.  But I will probably do that at 8 am.

I prayed for forgiveness for people but I feel I am still at risk for anger problems.  But at least I got the prayers in.  There are just so many problems out there and people mistreating others.

I think something triggered me recently but I don't know what it is. It could be left over from last week.

I think I should google stuff and use AI more. I think it would be interesting to me.

Anyway I do feel like sending out 300 million valentines that say I don't respect you.

Well, have a good day everyone.

 Hi everyone, this is Refried. It is Thursday, June 18. I walked two miles and bought some more ground coffee because I ran out a while ago and was using some espresso that was not normal.  A few minutes ago, I took my medicine, so I am caught up on that and should not be tortured by housing staff. 

My video got plenty of views. So far I think the most popular one was when I had that dark blue shirt on and did the april fools jokes. I think this time it is just too bad that I closed my eyes for the last half.  But it is okay. That is the only video like that out of five.  And sometimes it wasn't that my eyes were closed, I was just looking down.

So anyway, it was another good experience. I am signed up for a trauma comedy class in July and August, and a children's book conference.  I need my mom to make a deposit for that but I don't know if she will be able to very soon.

Possibly I should revisit the pink shirt video.  And see how it compares. I just think some of the jokes weren't as funny in that video.  And yet I myself was a little bit funnier.  So that is interesting, live and learn.  My new videos are pretty funny, and maybe that format is just as good.  The selfie format.

Have I eaten lunch today? I might eat some apple jacks and then take a nap. This morning I had interesting dreams and woke up feeling okay.

I wonder if maybe this excitement will wear off and then I am reminded of the books just sitting there on amazon. What does it all mean, I do not know.

Well, have a good day everyone.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is June 18. I just talked to my mom.  Her knee is bothering her and she is using the walker instead of the cane.  The doctor thinks her knee is hurting because of compensating from the hip.  Hopefully she will feel better soon. I mean maybe even in a day from resting it.

She was proud of me for doing the comedy show.  I did have a joke about her but that is normal for comedians to do that.  You just kind of have to, more so than even being a nonfiction writer or doing memoir and essays. So I think it is okay.

About a hundred people watched my whole comedy video.  That is really good and is rewarding on facebook. So I am thankful for the facebooking that I still have. But I miss my friends and life woudl be different if I saw their posts more often and heard from them more, too.  But I got about 60 likes on that photo and 42 likes on the video. And probably some people don't click like until they know what content is. I do not know if I will be judged for any of it.  I feel okay about all the jokes.  Some didn't hit that well and get a huge laugh but mostly it was a good audience that laughed plenty. But that is an interesting thing in comedy is that you really can't totally predict the audience.  I think this audience felt a little sorry for me and could see my disability.  But I think they did like me and my jokes, too.  Several people said so after the show, and I don't usually get that.

I think also even though I am not sure I got my outfit right and I am not looking very good, this is all more experience and I learn something new each time.  But I also think that my disability limits me and I can't control the performance perfectly because of the memory challenge. Like it is really freaking hard for me to remember the jokes, and you can see me stumble a little bit sometimes.  And that is all while not nailing the mood and style and eye contact, etc.  But I think it could improve with practice.

I hope I can sign up for that next class. I think I might need to pay the deposit and then get the rest of it. My finances just aren't great right now.

 Gice honestly this was not that easy of a day, waiting two hours for that video to download, then two twenty minutes again to upload, then the nonideal facebook boost, and facebook manipulating me to format things in ways that benefit them.  I need to not be swayed by the numbers.  My friends who watched the video do like it. And I am not boosting it to strangers.  I can see the plan, to do individual joke clips for what I know is perfectly original and memorable, and I will send that around sometime. I mean when, I do not know.  The urgency I feel is kind of because of computer files.  

So I am thinking save a bunch of clips in the quick time program, and then translate them to reels, put them all on one page, and then boost over time in the fall, probably.  I mean maybe people say, why wait, well there is a reason, and that is financial.

I mean saving the clips could be a project very soon. But I should think, because there are a lot of comedy videos out there now, and do I need to join a frenzy or just be patient and share a little bit here and there as I feel like it. I mean I do not know.  I just really love memes.  Memes are legit.  Possibly I could be one of the bad guys not giving some jokesters their full credit as comedians.

So anyway.  I am tired. I guess watch some youtube and listen to music.  What is tomorrow.  Tomorrow is clean up and maybe use OTC for coffee at Key Food.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. It is 11:23. I am drinking coffee but it did not brew right so it is questionable but okay. I posted my video earlier and I felt kind of middle of the road about it, like not as enthused as I felt Sunday immediately after the show.  But the people who watched it liked it and got the jokes, and there is nothing I really feel ashamed of about it. I mean I don't like that I start closing my eyes too much in the second half, but it is only four minutes,  And I am okay with the rocking even though I kind of look a little too much like I am dancing.  But it's not that bad and I think it is an okay amount that I stop sometimes and stand still.  And then the rushed, stress feeling, I think no one really notices that much because of the variety on facebook, and because of the sound being off for some people.  

I am okay with the captions and think the jokes still come through.  Basically it is a video of me doing actual stand up comedy and I am happy with that.  I think I am not going to send it around with a boost but I might harvest all the videos sometime and take the jokes out.  I think that would give me about 40-50 usuable clips and I could do them as reels and put them on a separate page with some other selfie videos and boost them sometime.  I mean maybe shoot for the fall on that, or consult with the teacher of the trauma class which I will hopefully take soon.  I need to ask my mom tomorrow.

Anyway, appearance.  It is just a huge shirt and I think I look kind of larger than I had to in the video, but really it is a real thing that I am over-overweight.  But the reasons for that are psych meds and abuse, and I will do the best I can.  I mean things will go how they go.  I think I will try to do some walks downtown.

Also- profile views.  It is okay. I am just mostly okay and consistent throughout the six videos that I have. I just really think it is okay and other people are other people and I am me for certain reasons.  And I did keep in shape for the first 20 years of adulthood.  And then seven in new york until the bad people ruined it. I mean how bad.  God will say how he feels about it someday. To me it seems that with my particular case, he always thinks it is best to let the damages accrue.

 Hello everyone, this is Refried. I got my comedy video back and it is good. It is a keeper.  I will probably share it on facebook soon, though I might wait some hours or a day until I fully have thought about it more.  I think there are some delivery issues that could be better. At least I can see it for myself.  I just think some of it is an ability issue where I really might not be able to do better unless i am performing more often.  I checked out a lot of other comedy sites and saw a few possible paths that don't seem just right.  But it helps me see I am on a good path already.

My therapist gave me a link that I think could work out but I need to ask my mom to help me take the class. I hope she says okay because it is a cool trauma class.

The video is one fifth downloaded after twenty minutes.  Man it will be hard to be patient. I think my internet is normal instead of slow starting tomorrow so I could try again if I am not able to be patient enough today. I mean honestly it could be impossible.

Has anyone else seen my video? What do you gice think? I think it is pretty good but I am not a superstar. I mean I felt a little bit at superstar level but I think I have some things working against me. Mostly my appearance is okay but a little too pudgy. Eyes are closed too much, my teacher has told me that before. But I did look at the audience sometimes.

I think it is okay. I am just disabled. I am a writer. I do the best I can. 

Well, let's see if this blog post will post without disrupting the download.